Thursday 19 March 2009

Uncertainty

The past few weeks,I became uncertainty.I hardly consentrate and commit with studies as well things i wanted to do.My mind couldnt get rid all those negative vibes.I am full with negative vibes which cause me millions of tears.Susah hati all the time.Serabuts.I was supposed to do presentation for CIMA GLOBAL competition and i decided to quit last min as no preparation but James Browne (FR lecturer)wanted me to be in if those classmates not qualified.I didnt tell papa yet about my cancellation.He must be frustrated if i tell him.Shooootttt.I hate this.I hate the feelings i had now.I felt down.Desperately need Mama and Papa here.I wish im HOME now to tell them my vulnerability,being under mama's arm,hugs papa and cry my heart out.Yes,im not strong.So today,I had coffee with Din,Tasha and Shyra at Reflection after class.Thank u for the time and InsyaAllah i byk kan doa and recite quran so i can put extra strength on myself.Pls wish me luck so I can handle all the things that bothered since then.*sigh*


Apart from my sorrow which really sounds pathetic,Zeileen,Berg and their friend are coming down to Dublin on 23nd May.They'll arrive in London and will take plane to Dublin.So excited because after months of planning,they finally bought the tickets last weekend.Cant wait to be their tourist guard!There are so many things to catch up with org2 Malaysia nieh!


Oh yea,Miera rang me while i was cooking just now.Oh babe,i so missing u!serious unsangkerable when i saw ur number.jerit2 i.i rinduuuuuuuuuuuu u nak matis ok.I nak hugs u kuat2 ok?I wont be back this summer.To Liyana,if u come across this,I rindu u too babe!Btw,Congratulation in advance to Hajar Darling.Selamat Pengantin Baru.So sad I cannot attend ur big day.ur dream wed come true.i do miss zaman uitm where we always talk about wedding!

and,

Thank u Yan Lim and Aysha for the thoughts.Really appreciate ur concern-ness.Hello,I kan always never ending story.


toodles,
Akmaygsgttakok.

4 comments:

Anonymous said...

darling,pray harder ya...ething will b ok..FOCUS daring plsss...its ur final sem aite..luv ya!!

Yan Lim said...

Babe, I know how you feel eventhough not the same but similar. The feeling of uncertainty. Feeling down then rasa sakit hati sangat and only by crying you rasa lega (sikit).

I sometimes feel that too, because of past history yang sepatutnya dah tak perlu fikir but as human, we still do. So what I do is, I divert my mind. When it occurs, you just try your best to divert it to something else. Think about something else. Force yourself. Try that.

Anonymous said...

its interesting reding your delima.....well as always in the light of summer we cant make a speculation that it will always be sunny every day, there will also be rain come and gone.same implication in life...like a flower starting to blossom,we will always hope that it will become a beautiful flower but then we still never know about whether it will be blossoming the way we want or event it may not able to blossom at all due to certain factors and variables in life...the point related to this is we always wanted everything to go smoothly by forgetting the fact that it may not be so and we have to struggle harder in order to achieve what we want.

about the negative vibe,always have posotive thingking in your mind,be optimistic in what you do then it is easier for you to overcome all the bariers that is in your way.REMEMBER...when you are down always REMEMBER of one thing that is,how ever tough the condition that you are in there always be the ONE that always be there to help you,and to hear you,and may perhaps with HIS might,HE will help you get through all your difficulties in life...

so....cheer up! look forward...there is still alot for you to grab..........:-)

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Amirah said...

Darlingggg..why u lambat sgt balik ? tak best la camnie..
so anyways, i see that u're feeling down based on your entries but i'm not sure why..i wanna know ! but babe, sadness is part of our lives..the ups and downs we have to face..for the past 3 months i've been having the ups and downs..but whenever the negative vibes come, just cry babe..it will release the sadness..then tell urself, "okay i'm done..what to do now?"...hang with friends..talk with friends..me and liyana are far..find someone near to u babe..of course my other way is to club like almost everynight..haha..but i think u shouldnt do that :P okay babe ? take it easy..the challenges in ur life just gets u going..it will make u stronger..come to think of it, if we dun face any sadness this life wont be as interesting as it is now..i love u babe *hugs*