Sunday 2 December 2012

The new ride



This is a particularly hard one for me (and many other people) to master. I find myself playing and replaying things that have happened over and over and over again. Whether it's a conversation I had with someone that didn't go well or a situation that caused months and months of heartache, recalling this incident over and over again does absolutely nothing to change it. I am a firm believer in learning from our mistakes, but there is a line that must be drawn between the analysis needed to learn from a mistake and the obsessive tape-loop of replaying a moment over and over again. However, this does nothing good for me -- or the situation that is over and done with. The only thing to do here is take what I can from the past and move on.


I can't quite remember the face anymore. But the mention of the name would still conjure up a feeling which I can't express.Frankly,I don't feel him anymore. I have moved on with my life,embarking new life which I can't imagine I can be this strong.And of course,people say,life can't go on that way.You can't be madly,passionately in love forever.So that love changes,it morphs.Everybody else perceived me as aloof and strong,but they never knew how you were my one weakness,the love I could never seem to get over.


"Fake it 'til you make it."


Days,weeks,months,years has passed really quick.I am completely broken.Heartbroken.torn apart.destroyed.


To see you with someone who makes you happy and would put a smile on your face and you fulfilling your dreams would give me a sense of unbearable lightness.I was never big enough to fill your shoes and maybe yours were just too big to fit into mine.But every single thing happened,there's always a hidden reason.


Life, isn't paradise. It's not a dream or a fantasy. It's real. And reality can definitely bite.29 DAYS till I make a decision how does 2013 will look like.I have promised mom to come up precisely what is the plan.

xx

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