494 days

It took a long time , a lot of years of doing things to make myself stronger and, in some ways, harder , to get to the point where I was ready to accept the reality. I just looked around one day and it hit me like a bat to the head "what is happening now?". I had that cliched experience of looking around and realizing where I am now and ask myself, "Why? Why now? 

I think many people never realize it at all and end up floating along on whatever path they happen to find themselves drifting down. I was that person. I was that drifter, just floating and thinking I'd get there someday.For instance, my relationship. I had hope that things would work out, but I didn't want to work for it. I just thought it would happen. Well, I can tell you from personal experience...things don't "just happen." Yes, sometimes there are those moments of excitement when things seem like they're falling in place and in split seconds, the excitement turned out to fall into places...

I can think back on some times in my life when I was really down and I mean really down  and I can remember them as terrible, dark times when the world was against me and no hope was in sight. OR I can look back at them and look for the good that came from them.I can look at how strong I became from dealing with a lot of situations that other people are never faced with. I can find the good in the bad and that makes the present a much happier now.. 

 I decided that I needed to change myself and it certainly didn't happen over night. It took a long time probably years if you count all of those failed attempts from my past especially relationships to get where I am right now, but I know, there is always a new beginning of every ending. 

The future, as we all know by now, is unknown. No matter how much we plan and prepare and do what we can to control it, we never know what kinds of surprises life is going to hand us. From perfectly wrapped moments to ticking time bombs (and everything in between), life gives us some pretty interesting gifts. 

Cherish your loved ones!