To be happy it first takes being comfortable in your own shoes. The rest can work up from there." You really have to be happy with yourself before you can be happy with anyone or anything else. And what better way to be comfortable with yourself than to spend time with yourself! We all take ourselves for granted, spending very little time alone (unless, of course, you're a loner like myself who makes a point to have at least some alone time each day). Whether we avoid being alone because we are scared to get to know ourselves or we can't seem to find a moment to ourselves, when we don't take time to enjoy ourselves, to really learn about who we are, we miss out on an extremely positive experience that can enrich not only our lives but the lives of those around us.
In my life, I have made bad choices and then I've made them over and over and over again. I've walked down the street, seen the hole, and fallen in over and over and over again. It's happened on purpose. It's happened by accident. It's happened by habit. But, for whatever reason, it's happened.
When you know yourself and are happy with yourself, everything around you has a more positive glow. You don't need to rely on others, situations, or things for your happiness. You are your happiness. When you're happy with who you are -- or, if you are even aware of who you are and aren't 100% happy with that person -- you can identify with others better. You can find a place of contentment that most people spend their lives searching for. I remember myself searching for the perfect relationship, wanted to prove myself happy in a wrong relationship to others and at that juncture, I don't know what I really want in a relationship and hurt myself by accepting the other flaws because I thought, I have to accept the imperfection to be perfect.
But then again, I realized that God is testing me and He granted me a strength to move on and have a good life. At this juncture, I realized all the happiness in other things except for relationship were amazing. When He took away something, He never failed to replace me with something better than a love to His creature. Sometimes, when I feel hopeless whenever my mind begin to think, I told myself, "you should be grateful". Never imagine that another opportunity to perform umrah again this year after came back in 2012. When my dad told us that he wanted to bring the whole family including her sister, I was so excited. Syukur Alhamdulillah. I am so excited to be given another opportunity visiting His utmost place.
I would like to take this opportunity to extend my apologies to everyone including the loyal readers of this blog. Sorry for wrongdoings and what I have said/mentioned in this blog which hurt some of the readers. Please pray for my safe journey and inshaAllah, I will update once I am back. To those who always pray for my happiness, secretly read my blog and dropped comments/ email/ texted me, thank you for the nicest comments to boost my motivation level. Besides, I just found out my new-boss and new colleagues are reading my blog too. Hehe.